Monday, March 14, 2011

day eight - a photo that makes you sad

second post in one day - so i'm up-to-date now.
todays actual post is supposed to be a photo that makes you angry or sad; and i have chosen...

a photo that makes me sad:



alright, this photo is actually a photo that was part of my friends folio for studio art, her theme being: "3 masks of me - my past and my flowing future."

i'm not going to lie, the first time i saw this photo, it really upset me.
you see, my friend suffers, as too many people do, with depression.

what so many people don't realise is how serious mental illness can be. an illness like depression can take a hold on your entire body, not just your mind, until the things that you are thinking and doing, seem normal to you. this is your reality, and despite all the positive things going on around you, you just seem to take the negative out of every situation.

i have quite a few friends with depression, and it breaks my heart to see them so sad, so self-loathing, so depressed.
however, i have learnt over the past 6 months or so that i personally cannot save them - yes i can support them and tell them every day that i love them so so much, but i don't need to be feeling it myself.

i have had a few friends tell me that i just don't understand, and i used to get really angry about the fact that i couldn't understand what they were going through. but i have come to realise that i don't need to understand. all i need to do is to be a good friend, even if that means being the friend who has no idea what is going on, but instead is there just to distract their friend, have a jam session, go to the movies, go on a picnic, anything that means that the friend can be as happy possible.

i have learnt that although i want to take their pain away, no matter how much i try, i just can't - they're going to need to get help themselves. but sometimes this is a lot easier said than done. which brings me to my next point...

earlier this year i heard from a speaker, Ingi Barr - the author of "Walking the Black Dog."
she spoke about her experience with bipolar disorder and her depressive episodes. it was something that i really took on board, because the whole point of her speech was not only to inform us about the effects of depression/bipolar/mental illness, or how we can help someone with this disease, but to reduce the stigma that comes with speaking about mental illness.

WHY is mental illness not spoken about? it can be just as life-threatening as a physical disease, and if the stigma was reduced then maybe people wouldn't be so afraid to ask for help.

as for some of my friends who suffer with depression, i will admit, i cannot handle their issues all the time. sometimes i just need to take some time for myself, and refocus what's important, so that i am in a better place myself to help them.
but even if i do ask them to back off, that doesn't mean i won't text them to tell them i love them, or that i care any less.

reduce the stigma of mental illness.
so perhaps, peoples "3 masks of me" won't have to involve depression, or covering up how they are really feeling.

i love you.
xx

1 comment:

  1. <3 tears kelly i love u and thanks so much....... sumtiems all u need to hear it ILOVE U and it saves the day. this is beautiful

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