So yes, it has been a while since the last blog, and why you may ask?
Exams?
Shows?
Work?
Social Life? (well, the small one that actually does exist...)
Well you see, it's not that I haven't actually sat down to write a blog, I have, it's just that I haven't had anything to write about.
I have sat down at the computer, and attempted to write something witty, something funny, maybe something that will have an impact on someone's life, but there's nothing there.
Nothing to write about, nothing to talk about, no stories to tell, nobody to talk to if there was. Hell, I don't even know if anybody reads these blogs...
So this brings me to the point of this perhaps even unread blog.
That's right, I finally found something to write about.
How do I know who's there?
The real issue behind this question is trust. Something that I am finding difficult at the present time. Don't ask me why, but I just am. Maybe it's because in the past few years there have been more people in my life that have betrayed my trust rather than earnt it and kept it.
Some of these people I have forgiven, and am friends with once again, but my real problem is when it comes to the people who are close to me now.
I have shut everyone out. I trust you, I promise that I trust you! It's not you, it's me - all the cliches that we have heard a million times before.
But maybe that's just it - they are cliches because they ARE cliche.
So here it is, an apology, a new years resolution, a new beginning.
I'm sorry if I've shut you out. I'm sorry if you felt as though I didn't want you there, when the truth is probably that I wanted you there more than ever but didn't know how to say it. But mostly I'm sorry for all my mistakes, my flaws, and my excuses, for I know that as cliche as it sounds, it's true - it was never you, it was me.
In the new year, I hope I can trust again. Or maybe if I'm lucky I may even be trusted in return.
I wish upon a star for a new beginning. For all of this to go away, so I can start a clean slate.
I'm sorry that I'm not the person you might have wished for, but there's always a chance of starting a-fresh next year.
How do I know who's there?
Show me.
